|Will you light my candle? Slim pickins' left at the South Bay Stop & Shop|
For city folks like myself, prepping for a storm is sort of confusing. Most of us don’t own our homes and bathe in a stand-up shower stall. We can hardly take care of ourselves when the sun is shining, never mind with a freaking Frankenstorm looming.
Here, my top Hurricane prep tips for city dwellers:
1) Get thee to the liquor store.
2) Check the dates on the relics in your cabinet. The Campbell’s Chunky soup you’ve moved from your last three apartments is most likely expired. It’s time to replace the soup you’ll never eat. And now that I think about it, if the power goes out, you can’t heat it up. So, on second thought, just keep it there. You certainly don’t want to have to take out the trash in the rain.
3) Figure out who the hell your landlord is, and if they have a phone number.
4) Borrow seasons of television shows, I highly recommend Homeland.
5) Go to the grocery store. Trust me, the takeout leftovers rotting in your fridge are not going to get your through the storm surge.
6) Maybe you think those warnings about “getting your prescription medicine” don’t apply to you. But, I have one question for you: Have you purchased your Claritin D? Get your arse to CVS, hand over your license and make sure you’re weathering Sandy sans post-nasal drip.
7) If you’re of the essential employee genre like myself, don’t bother getting ready for work. I mean, yes, get up and go to your place of employment. Just don’t waste your time applying makeup and blow-drying your hair. Once you get to your office you’re going to look like a nasty drowned rat.
8) The flashlight app on your Iphone is going to be useless when your phone is dead. Trek it to True Value and buy one of the last emergency light sticks they have on the shelf. Oh, and charge your phone now people.
I hope Sandy’s impact on my readers is minimal and that you make it to Wednesday with a few bottles of wine to spare. For my own entertainment, please share your Hurricane preparation tips in the comments section below.